After last night Shadowqueen has left me alone. I don't know what she thought she was doing, and she's just going to get us in so much trouble. I feel horrible - Shadowqueen left me last night a crying shaking mess, feeling physically sick. I felt her curled up inside me, purring and gloating like a cat that has not only had all the cream but has gutted a few small helpless fluffy creatures as well. She just flirts too much and I hate it. She completely shut me out last night and started firting with men, playing with their affections, even if there was no way in hell either of us would ever fancy them. She knows I'm happy the way I am. I love my boyfriend and I would never want to hurt him but she's risk taking and I don't like it.
The Catholic part of me is scared now. What if God will punish us for what she has done. I get this feeling I will lose everything I care about and I bet I will now fail my exam and my life will be ruined purely due to her waywardness. I wish I had more control over her. I MUST have more control over her. I feel so unhappy today and tired, as I had difficulty sleeping.... this must change.
Random_emo_girls
Does Shadowqueen only come out when you are speaking to people online? Because I get that alot, although in my case I think it's almost a good thing. I recently got introduced to a friend of a friend. He lives in the same area as me and we got along ok-ish online but because I was getting hyper and flirty, I found I was scaring him off a bit. We met up anyway some time later and we got on just fine. He seemed to like the "real" me alot more than the confident person I appeared to be online.